"The Happiest Place on Earth..."

 No, it's not Disney World.  According to the UN's Annual Happiness Report, Finland has been the happiest society on Earth for six years in a row. 

Finland? Yup. Finland. The New York Times recently did an interesting piece about this, talking to a sample of individual Finns, and one of the themes that emerged was that "happy" was more what we would call "contentment"  or “fulfillment.” 

Finns derive satisfaction from leading sustainable lives and perceive financial success as being able to identify and meet basic needs... (4/1/23)

Why Isn’t America As Happy As Finland?

Many believe that our economy depends upon personal dissatisfaction. Americans are shown by our media a constant diet of what wealthy people are doing at peak experience. Unsurprisingly, this is driven by marketing – and it has been this way a long, long time.  Shows like "Leave it to Beaver" and others in the 50s were designed by advertising agencies to sell the new creation: "suburban living."  The portrayals of happy housewives like June Cleaver and Samantha in Bewitched were there to sell the glories of new kitchen appliances.  Ordinary characters in TV and movies live in amazing (and completely unaffordable) apartments in places like Manhattan and San Francisco.  Today, these themes continue. For example, Emily (in Paris) and her broke roommate Mindy are in a constantly changing array of haute couture, completely unbelievable to their financial circumstances.  

It’s Not Just Our Standard of Living Expectations – It’s Who We Are That’s Not Enough

We are constantly shown what is wrong with us.  George Lister, faced with a failing antiseptic product invited "halitosis" (bad breath) – and Listerine made history.  Today, we are afraid of not having perfect skin, perfect hair, white enough teeth, smelling too much or too little.  Is shampooing our hair an orgiastic experience?  Try this product and see.  

The Truth Is, We Can Have Enough. For Every Citizen.

(and Still Have a Functioning Economy)

In most civilized countries, like Finland, it's not a financial burden to have children.  Child care is provided, as are social services, top public schools, health care and higher education.  It's not the employers' job to decide what kind of, and how much, health care or child care their employees get.  Provision for each other through a robust social safety net frees up people to not only live good lives individually, but fires up their ability to work in jobs, create companies and innovate.  

Think a culture of unhappy is necessary for successful capitalism in America? Nope. Other countries prove that unhappy is not necessary to have a functioning economy.  

So, What’s the Cost of Unhappy and Not Enough?

Who suffers from the American ethos of needing more, more, more and that the experience has to not only a peak experience, but the "peak-est"?  Our health picture says it all. Every single one of us is affected by the culturally-driven dissatisfaction, self-criticism and temptation to financial excess.  You can see right away how this makes the narrative of depression and anxiety much worse.  Of course, the ridiculous standards of beauty impact on those vulnerable to eating disorders. 

And of course, when people are hurting, the worse they hurt, the more determined they are to stop hurting.  If they can't afford mental health care, then they turn to street pharmacy -- drugs and alcohol.  This, of course, helps the economies of those industries.  Or they turn to comfort eating, and agribusiness has hooked us on cheap unhealthy foods designed to hijack us with sweet and salty tastes, keep us exhausted and load on the unhealthy weight (enter the weight loss industry, stage left…).

Let’s Play What If: Imagine America, the Land of …Enough (for Everyone)

Go on a thought experiment with me.  What would America be like if we felt that we were good enough?  What if our cultural goals were lead by having enough and being content?   

What would it be like, if instead of fighting how to cut the budget and throw people off of services, we fought to see if we could create a sufficient, healthy, safe and enjoyable America for everyone?  What if we really wanted for others what we want for ourselves: and then committed to doing it, without attacking or persecuting their differences?  

What If We Really ARE Enough?

I spend the day caring for beautiful people whose internal landscape is full of hurt and pain and the fear that they won't ever be enough or be content.  And right now, I’m competing with an entire “culture of consumption” that tells literally everyone that they are not enough.

A culture shift like the one I’m proposing would make my job a whole lot easier.  Being in a society that’s committed to collective happiness and well-being – a society that does not see that goal as sacrificing “individual freedom" – would not only be refreshing, it could save sanity and souls.  

My advice:  

You are enough. And go tell that to someone you love.  And then go say it to a stranger.  And keep saying it and showing it to yourself and to others.