Surviving the Holidays 2022
Joy, Anxiety, Togetherness, Isolation – Yep, It’s the Holidays
This time of year is set up in the media as the time for “perfect” families, peak experiences and happiness for all. That doesn't always neatly square with our actual families (birth, chosen or blended) or what we are experiencing right now.
The fact is, this can be a tough time of year, one that brings up a lot of sadness and anxiety. If we buy into the “ideal holidays” portrayed on movies and TV, it can make it much harder. On a larger scale, we are dealing with an increase of intolerance, growing polarization, war, economic instability. And socially, this year the pressure to gather and celebrate with more family and friends has reached intensity – this, combined with an overlay of continuing concerns about rising rates of COVID, RSV and the flu just adds to the anxiety and confusion.
Take a Breath: Let’s Step Back to Basics
Go on a thought experiment with me. What are the holidays supposed to represent? My mother used to say, "Any day that causes human beings to wish each other a day of peace and give goodwill is a good day for me." I think we can all agree to that.
It seems like every northern hemisphere tradition has a holiday in the fall and winter. Early in the cycle was the Indian Holiday of Diwali, Hanukkah is this week. Then the Solstice and Christmas, followed by Kwanzaa. Note the prominence of lights in all of them. Each promotes hope, inspiration and community.
It's important to remember that we are not the first to celebrate despite dark and troubling times. Our ancestors were often poor, in much less free countries, sometimes in the midst of war or plague. Yet they turned to the meaning and experience of these times to bring light and joy to their lives. They did it without cards, expensive gifts or travels. They looked for the meaning inside of these times, the lessons they could glean and the connections they could make.
Relax ~ and Kindle a Little Brightness
Maybe it's time to return to the basic lessons of each holiday, and to promote as much gratitude and goodwill for each other as we can. Maybe this is the time to overlook that annoying cousin, extend tolerance to that family member that is a little crazy-making. Instead, appreciate the simple, wonderful fact that they and we are alive. We get to share moments with each other ~ a cookie, hot chocolate, hug and conversation at a time. Maybe the best holiday gift of all is to genuinely connect with each other -- especially those who are alone. Can we let go of the perfect holiday and can we embody the holiday spirit?
No matter what your tradition or your holiday - I am grateful for you, and I wish each and every one of you a very good season!